april clark is pulled into a private room, in
which she will be thoroughly investigated
(patted down (by which i mean felt up))
because the x-ray man/machine believes
that she is carrying a plane crash just
between her legs (which, oh boy, does it
feel like it (“it” being a bomb worth going
into a private room for))

              //

april clark takes the train home from the
airport. she imagines the train is a sleek
and shiny plane that will leave the tracks
any moment and glide over tangled
freeways to wherever. but of course, the
train can’t be a plane, because she didn’t
even have to go through security

              //

april clark is a white and well-off woman,
who is trans. she is unlikely to be
murdered in the streets

              //

april clark tells the TSA agent what she is
(“what she is” being the best way to make
herself legible in this moment) so as to
reassure the TSA agent that she doesn’t
want the plane to crash either. and the TSA
agent tells her to feel lucky that she’s the
kind of woman who has the money to take
an airplane anywhere. and then the TSA
agent says, okay, april clark, i’m going to
feel you here, just in case. and the TSA
agent goes to explore the plane crash (for
about a second) before the TSA agent
realizes what sort of plane crash it is, and
stops

              //

april clark remembers a boy back in
middle school saying, hey, are those plane-
crash pants? because, damn, girl, your
ass is looking hot. april clark is not
wearing her plane-crash pants today

              //

april clark, is that your real name? did you
choose your name, april? how did you
choose your name, april? and, why isn’t
your name august, april? isn’t your
birthday in august, april? is that the name
on your passport, april? is that your legal
name, april? is that the name on your birth
certificate, april? is that the name in your
DNA, april? is that the name they’re going
to put on your tombstone when the plane
goes down, april? i have an almond milk
chai latte on the bar for april. welcome
back to the USA, april

              //

april clark tells the TSA agent, it’s okay, i
get it, even though she doesn’t. april clark
takes a plane out of her body any time it
experiences anger. her head is a very busy
airport these days. there are lots of crashes.
luckily her lawyers are relentless. she has
never seen their faces

              //

april clark’s mother has always been
terrified of plane crashes, and doesn’t like
it when april flies without her. she would
rather they all die together, if they die

              //

april clark laughs and imagines that this is
the start of a terrible porn film called
“april clark gets fucked by state power.”
the film made test audiences nauseous.
somewhere in the film, she imagines that
she begs the TSA agent to pat her down
(by which i mean feel her up (repetitive,
april)) because she is very much obsessed
with feeling uncomfortable. the whole
situation is very uncomfortable and
doesn’t have a real ending